The Alpha. . .

Introductions should always come first. Before you can begin to appreciate me or my experiences, it helps to know who I am and where I'm coming from, right? As you wish. . .

My name's Todd and I live in northern California, USA. I'm a journalism student working full-time as a bill collector for a subscription software company. I'm currently single and "looking" but having a hard time "finding" because most girls seem to have an aversion to giants with poor self-esteem and acne scars. Also, the cat that I live with just sprayed in the dryer so I constantly smell like I just fucked a cluster of horny mackerel tabbys.

I've decided to expand my blogging to beyond just a MySpace page for a couple of reasons. Reason the first: I'd like more people to start reading what I'm writing. That's a very scary notion for someone like me who attempts to avoid attention at all costs, but I'm taking baby steps into becoming a more well-adjusted person. I wish me luck.

Reason number two: I can have advertising on my blog that can earn me a passive income. This in turn gives me motivation to generate useful, entertaining content in the hopes that I can get some of you to click me into a new car. Seriously, it's the American Dream to be able to sit on your duff and just have money come rolling in, so if you find yourself with five seconds to kill then please click on an ad. I'm not asking you to buy anything. It's more like I'm panhandling. You can be more comfortable knowing that I won't buy booze with the money (at first) and I'm not a filthy criminal like most homeless people. I'm just lazy.

What you'll get here is not anything revolutionary. I'm just a regular dude for the most part. What I'm offering are my observations and opinions about whatever retarded stuff is happening around me, whether it's public record or just in my personal life. Maybe you'll like it. Maybe you'll despise me. Maybe you'll click on an ad or four. I'm not a mind-reader.